no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
