im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I just had sex on a roof
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
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