Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
