Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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