If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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