He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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