she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
