So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
You can't special order awesome
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
