I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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