Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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