I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
