she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Randomize
