i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
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