just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
