How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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