so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
