I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
that may or may not have been my penis.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
