maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
