He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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