Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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