I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I skipped work to stalk him.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize