Your face is a jimmy john
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
