"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
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