she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
