big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
