I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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