I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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