And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
