'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
