What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
