just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
