you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
