Pregnant stripper...not hot.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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