haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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