Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
You were trust falling into bushes
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
