I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
