GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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