i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
