he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
