waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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