New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
