Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
