we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize
