The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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