You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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