i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
