I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
