We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
