I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
