oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
